show you everything I have done.

gritting my teeth to perfection.

its 10 days away. I'm scared and excited and nervous and demanding all in one. I am seeing them in 10 days. holy cow. and I plan on calling Mel earlier that day to tell her the surprise I have for her. She's going to be so happy. I'm glad I'll be able to do that for her. I have been so busy lately. and stressed. not stressed about the standard things such as homework or sleeping or cleaning. no, I've been stressed with relationship issues that aren't even my own. and money. and what I will do come March. its my own decision. there isn't someone here telling me "oh you have to go to school" so I get to choose what to do. it makes sense to get it over with and earn my BA now, since I'll have my general ed done. I even want to get it over with but the money. its easy to talk about it and even plan to transfer to UNLV but when it comes to the financial calculations, I don't have any of the money saved. I don't have some hidden savings account full of thousands of dollars to pay for tuition, meal plans, books, personal necessities or ANYTHING. I barely have enough money to go to The Fray concert and pay for both of those tires. I don't even make enough to survive on my own. I couldn't afford rent, food, electricity or anything at the moment. its so frustrating. and here I am blubbering on while I should be doing homework. oh well. at least I'm listening to The Hider acoustic. I really love VersaEmerge. and I'm wearing this shirt of theirs I bought months ago. how appropriate...