to own a heart that's half of yours

I found something I wrote January 3rd about 2008:

2008.
A new year. A time to reflect on the passed year, to think of all the experiences and fun a person has had. Many peopl, myself included, write down resolutions, things they would like to accomplish within the next twelve months.
Some people I know don't feel as if this year is any different from the rest. As I think back, I realize that past new years felt like a day everyone stayed up very late, until wee morning hours and the next morning with a massive headache and a hangover, even for those few who didn't drink alcohol in celebration.
Yet, New Years Eve 2007, merely two days ago felt so special to me. The day began normally, except for a level of excitement that seemed too high an amount, considering I awoke at 6 in the morning. My excitement grew as the day progressed, almost untamable, running wildly in my mind and throughout my body. Midnight came and my number one resolution was announced:
Meet The Fray.
There are many things I would like to accomplish this new year, things that would be beneficial to my future and help to reassure worries I have about my life, but meeting my idols, my inspiration, my heroes The Fray is the most important thing to me.
It sounds silly and childish, perhaps even selfish but if that is the only thing I do this year, I will experience pure bliss. I honestly do not expect anyone to understand. How could you? The music sounds differently to me, I feel a deep connection that I can't explain right at all. I have listened t HTSAL more times than I can count and have yet to grow tired of the album. There was a period of about 5, maybe 6, months when I listened to nothing but that same CD, over and over. Listening to that album was such a grander experience than just hearing music.
With every music note, every melody and every lyric, I felt peace at a very confusing, emotional period in my life. I could relate to every single word and their music was nourishment for my soul. I have become a healthier person because of their music. All 12 songs on that album, I could feel the emotion behind the words.
I remember July 19, 2007, when I was supposed to be in LA watching them playthe music I love live, but instead I was watching videos on Youtube, crying my eyes out, completely miserable. That is why 2008 will be different. I won't be heartbroken again, crying my eyes out watching a video of them on my computer. I'll be front row, shouting the words, sweating profously and loving every moment.

maybe that will be 2009 since it was impossible in 2008 because they were in hiding. I don't know, but I'm happy. A new year is so exciting.